Up in Ya! -or- Don't Call Me Fluffy

EAST SIDE
“In Yr Own Wrds”
“Bring It Down”
“The Same”
“When You Say When”

WEST SIDE
“Hypocrite Song”
“Rechargeable”
“Have to Say”
“Afterbirth”

All Music & Lyrics ©1996, 2003 by billy Z duke / Quagmire (Sparky) Productions LTD
except for “Rechargeable” © 1996, 2003 by billy Z duke & Deane Kern.

Peruse the complete lyrics of Up In Ya! at yr desktop leisure with this petite ASCII text file.

If you need a hard copy of the original lyric sheet, just drop us a line. We have a huge unsoiled pile of them under the bed (which itself may or may not be soiled, depending on a number of factors we shall avoid listing here).

Three full songs are available for download (in 128kbit mp3 format), along with excerpts of the other five (in RealAudio format). This situation will improve in the future when I get more media storage space, hopefully to the point where all eight songs will be available in their entirety as mp3s.

Need some nifty software to play those mp3s with? Try Download Nullsoft Winamp FREE!. Once you amp, you won't cramp.

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EAST SIDE

“In Yr Own Wrds”

excerpt 0:56 ( RealAudio )    back up in ya ^

Ever since the second grade
you've been right behind my shoulder
and when I turn it seems to me you're not getting any older
gave yr brain up for a boulder

You handed in yr paper and the teacher asked, “Whose is it?
I've never seen a corpse before that's been quite this exquisite.”
I don't want a sentence of repentance from the mouth of a bard
I don't want to hear you say it wasn't so hard
I just want to hear it in yr own words

you play library on the lawn so everyone can see it
you've done yr time with every line
but I know you're skimming through it
looking for the quotable bit

You've stolen almost every single word you've ever written
especially the ones that seem a little bit forbidden
I don't want to argue with an article you only half-read
I don't want to take yr psych professor to bed
I just want to hear it in yr own words

you hesitate to turn the page
as if you already knew it
but after all is said and done
you'll still have to say and do it
without me to see you through it

You disobey yr parents and you dress a little sleazy
I never thought that anarchy could be so fucking easy
I don't want to know what other poets talk about in yr head
I don't want to take you or yr mother to bed
I just want to hear it in yr own words
I just want to hear it in yr own words
(I just want to hear it in yr own words)


“Bring It Down”

full song 3:22 ( 3.86 MB mp3 )    back up in ya ^

yr breathing makes me queasy
there's a secret in yr voice
I know you've got something to tell me
I can almost smell it hiding in yr hand

pick one card don't think too hard
no I'm not jealous
a simple yes or no would do
I didn't say I wanted you to

Bring it down
on my head
with all yr weight behind it
swing it high
grip it red
knuckles white just hold it tight
and make the lights go out

you're peeling all the price tags off yr new rags in yr room
stop it
you don't get to be romantic until you're geriatric
and married to the tube

I must have snoozed through all the clues
one lump
or two
the front page news in milk and crude
you said “I thought you wanted me to...”

and now I live within a bruise
it hurts whichever way I move
pass the salt and hold the truth
you said “I thought you wanted me to.”
I thought you wanted me

Bring it down
on my head
with all yr weight behind it
swing it high
grip it red
knuckles white just hold it tight
it's not too late to set me straight
I've come too far to not see stars
so make the lights go out


“The Same”

full song 4:31 ( 5.18 MB mp3 )    back up in ya ^

it just hasn't been the same since Elvis left the building
you see him in between my eyes and in the lines that gird my smile
so you take a picture to bring him back a while
and there are so many frames buttons and shells and macaroni painted
gold
all around my face but he isn't here it isn't him and I cannot replace

the things he gave to you made with you
I was but an acorn in yr hand
hardly thrown roots in stone carving out an epitaph
just a single photograph will break the mantel's back

it just hasn't been the same since they gave you yr diploma
the rings you used to write around the guys who used to put you down
look just like the ones that you jump through from nine to five
and you could call it a waste sump pumps and headboards and bubble wrap
the memories of this place
will eat you up eat you out eventually erase

the things you gave to him made with him
I was but a stain upon yr bed
centering engendering already filled with jealousy
like I was supposed to be
but you already knew that
I was a replacement I was just convenient

it just hasn't been the same since they granted you the payments
you see him in the dollar signs you see him in the dotted lines
and now it doesn't matter where I want to go to school
at least I still have his name though there's no one who will say it
and you prepare to fit the room with a nicely decorated groom
to help you throw it all away not sure that you deserve

the things he gave to you saved with you
I wasn't quite the answer to yr prayers
just a game to you played until everyone lost interest
in helping to clean up the mess that all of us had made

I am not a victim I just took a licking
and I'd like to see him if only for a weekend
it isn't fair to lock me in with all the things you might have been
I am not the same as him
I am not the same


“When You Say When”

full song 5:47 ( 6.62 MB mp3 )    back up in ya ^

when the sun goes down it goes down on you
and I've been steering the chariot since 1992
you called me heavy and so I tried to be
we both should thank our lucky stars
that bruises never bleed

I'll stop when you say when I'll let go of yr hand
I'll let go

give me five minutes and I'll give you the works
well maybe fifteen to smooth out all the quirks
don't take it easy when it's my turn, do yr worst
just let me teach you
and remember safety first

I'll stop when you say when and until then I won't let up
It's not enough
if you forgive me I won't forgive you
yr mouth is open
but I don't hear you

and I won't stop till you say when
I'll stop when you say when I'll let go of yr hands
I'll let go


WEST SIDE


“Hypocrite Song”

excerpt 0:46 ( RealAudio )    back up in ya ^

Here's a song about hypocrites who like to look at people's tits
As long as no one else is looking or notices they're hard
Here's a song about gentlemen who have no swords so with their pens
they cross out all the nasty words so children won't be scarred

The harder they are when they come
the louder the sound of the fall from grace
and saving face is not a ball when kids in every local mall
are burning you in effigy H I J K L M N O P

I can see them in their dressing gowns their faces painted like a clown's
good intentions fill their kidney pool retention fills their bowels with stool,
they're saying, "Why don't you give me a kiss goodnight?
It'll give me a reason to brush my teeth, hey honey..."

I can see them in their cabinet expurgating the alphabet
today they strike the letter "L" because it happens twice in "Hell"
Oh they think that what they're doing's excusable
cause they've never read The Crucible
they say, "Excuse me if I repeat myself,
sometimes I can't remember what I just said..."

The harder they are when they come
the louder the sound of the fall from grace
and saving face is not a ball when kids in every local mall
are burning you in effigy H I J K L M N O P
Q R S T U V W X Y Z.


“Rechargeable”

excerpt 1:06 ( RealAudio )    back up in ya ^

I can love a machine if it lies next to me with its
fiberglass arms twisted up underneath
the windows of my body
of my body

and I won't let it mean I can never get warm
I just have to make sure that she stays fully charged
in case of emergency

emerging from this sleep
with the faucet of thought still dripping
all of this power-tripping
wasted on me

I can pull my own strings but I'd rather pay you
do you cry in yr sleep I'll pay more if you do
not mind me window shopping
on yr body

glue my eyes to the screen sacrificing my shoes
trying hard to believe I'm alone in this room
with a dozen more eyes just like me

everything that I touch looks at me with mistrust
my credit limit is gone and I'm all saddled up
everything is rechargeable


“Have to Say”

excerpt 1:03 ( RealAudio )    back up in ya ^

does it matter what I give you
a reason or an excuse
I must have been a rabbit
cause all the dogs broke loose and shook to death
each and every part of what I said
I only stopped to draw a breath

I give you my confession with the utmost conviction
but that doesn't change the fact that it's probably fiction
if you ever stopped to listen
you might someday learn the difference

I just want a day when I don't have to say anything
just one day
when I don't have to say
what I don't have to say

could you repeat the question
I missed it the hundredth time
on second thought don't bother
besides the turn is mine forever
while you're all in love with the weather
I'll keep my tongue firmly tethered

now I've nothing better to do
than break down every now and then
in front of family and friends
take them on a semi-guided tour
of all the things I said before
I realized all they are is bored

I just want a day when I don't have to say anything
just one day
when I don't have to say my prayers
when I don't have to care
when I don't have to try so hard to keep complaining
keep complaining

nirvana is further and further away


“Afterbirth”

excerpt 1:03 ( RealAudio )    back up in ya ^

I was born from a fold in the road
I crawled out blue-eyed between two yellow lines
and I am indebted to them both

I was raised in a comfortable car
the windows a world of impossible speed
where I was taught what I should need
asleep inside an iron steed
while Santa Claus repeats the creed

there is no safety
there is no savior

I didn't want to know which color meant that I should go
I was afraid of the light but I had to watch it change anyway

my father tried to keep me inside
he would speak to her belly while she was asleep
and try his luck convincing me
that after birth there is no heat
that food is hard and flesh is meat

and there is no safety
and there is no savior

by the time I learned to drive I figured out that he was right
I didn't want to arrive but I came out anyway
I came out anyway

after birth the walls can speak
oil spills and hinges squeak
after birth you won't stay young
dangling from the bottom rung
asleep inside an iron lung

and there is no safety
there is no savior

and I don't want to know the reasons I should stop or go
I never asked to feel the sound of teeth on stainless steel
single file from nine to five
walking dead but still alive

when I decide
won't he be surprised
he cradled my body in his swollen eyes
but he never thought I'd have a face
he said